You can tell a mom by her baked goods. My kids’ schools are celebrating Teacher Appreciation Week. Today is treats for the teacher day and I dutifully lugged two dozen cookies to each school office. My cookie of choice? That’s easy, the chocolate chip cookies you place and bake. Thank you Pillsbury dough boy.
I haven’t introduced all the moms on the cul-de-sac yet. I would prefer to do that with a good glass of wine, but a few left over cookies works.
The teacher’s lounge was full of treats today. Juliet, the organic mom, brought some spinach based brownies she had baked from Jessica Seinfeld’s Deceptively Delicious cookbook. Unlike the same brownies I attempted at home, hers were delicious.
My friend Cheryl brought some scones from a local coffee shop. As a Cougar Mom, Cheryl packed her desserts in a Victoria’s Secret bag. She strolled into the elementary school lobby in her Juicy Couture sweat pants (the same pair as my teenager daughter’s friend) toting a large Victoria’s Secret shopping bag, complete with the requisite pink tissue, drawing both awestruck gasps and giggles from the 5th grade boys. The Leoninus Matris also got some looks from the other moms though in some perverse way we admire her knowing we don’t have the curves, cleavage or guts to carry it off.
My Apple Pie Mom friend Kate brought baskets of fresh baked shortcakes and strawberries and set up a make your own shortcake bar. Normally, this would annoy me tremendously; but, as a Pommum Pie Matris, Kate does these things not to show off or make the rest of us look bad, she does it because she likes it! Hers Is the Kool-Aid house where all the kids gather. She always has fun games and snacks for the kids without a trace of martyrdom.
Amy is the Obsessive-Compulsive Mom among us. She didn’t participate today. The idea of all that food, prepared in who knows what kind of kitchen, touched by little hands that have been who knows where and left out for all to breathe on was too much for the Detergio Disturbo Matris.
The resident Alpha Mom at the elementary school was on hand to give directions. Susan had things under control. I saw her again barking orders at the middle school and I know I will see her this afternoon at the preschool our youngest children attend. With kids in many different schools, and a key role in the PTA at each of them, she has hit the Alpha Mom trifecta. Susan is part of everything. If there’s a sport, a group, a school event, a neighborhood happening, the Alpha Matris is there and in charge. For her contribution to the baked goods extravaganza, she bought those huge sheets of muffins at Costco, one for each school.
The only other mom I saw today was Olivia, the Harvard Mom. She dropped off some nutty energy bars and headed straight for the library. As the Educatio Superus Matris, she has little time for such frivolous events. Although her children are only in first and third grades, she is planning their college careers. She did mention they were planning a family vacation to Williamsburg, Virginia to bring history alive for the children. They will also tour three colleges along the way.
That’s a brief introduction to a few of the moms in this suburban habitat. With unique traits and attributes, each matris is finding her way, relying on instinct to best raise her brood.
